Sad Day!!

Today has been a bit of a sad day for me. It was 11 years ago that my Pop passed away. It f**king (sorry Pop!!) devastated our whole family when we lost him. It does not feel that long ago, that I was a 17 year old on my P plates having to drive my inconsolable Mum from Canberra to Wagga. That was one day that I will never forget. I knew something had happened, because both my brother and I had skipped school and gone to my best mate Les' place to hang out. At 11.10am we went down to Calwell shopping centre to get something to eat. At 11.15am, I had the god awful feeling and thought that there was no way I could eat. Later on I would find out that was the exact minute that my Pop left this earth. Maybe it was his way of telling me that he was gone.

My life has not been the same since my Pop or my Uncle Eugene left us. In ways, I feel like alot of things in my life went down hill since then. It was like two out of the four men that I actually trust in this world had left me. I now only have my Dad and my brother there to trust and protect me.

I f**king hate death!! I f**king hate it!! I f**king hate having no control over s**t like that!!

Alright I am going to finish this as I can see it just getting worse. Sorry for the morbid mood, just not f**king happy at all.

Tomorrow is a new day and hopefully it will all be good when I get that cuddle that I want. :-)